In yoga class yesterday, the owner of the facility mentioned to the class that she knows that her 17 year old son is smoking pot and that she's not stupid because she used to smoke it when she was younger. She lives in the most affluent section of our City and told us that there had been a drug bust at the home of one her son's friends. She shared that they found "oxycontin" among other drugs. All I said was that it was an epedemic.
I went to my first Alanon meeting Tuesday evening...I had been to a few Naranon meetings months ago. There were about 12 people in attendance and the topic was grief. The facilitator spoke for a while about her grandmother having passed away 10 days earlier and then about 5 other people that she didn't know, but were either family or friends of co-workers who had also passed. There was a man there who was a bit obnoxious and initially I was thinking, "what am I doing here - I prefer to read my blogger friends' thoughts and inspiration", but when I left I realized that I learned more about myself during that hour. I learned to not make assumptions, to have more compassion, and that there are connections to thoughts and feelings that at first aren't apparent.
I've always felt that I was consistently good and nice to people. In Melody Beattie's Book, "Beyond Codependency", she addresses the issue of why then do we feel that many people don't treat us the same way. She explained that people treat us how we are acting towards ourselves. If you consistently put other people's needs before yours, this is what is reflected back to you. If you are always protecting other people's feelings rather than honoring yours, others will disregard your feelings as well. "Relationships are a mirror for our internal life".
This really rang a bell for me!
Peace, love and joy to all of you today!
5 comments:
That book is great..all of her books are.
Remember the phrase in AlAnon--"though you may not like us all, you will come to know us"..as in, we are all in the same boat!
It is a gentle program, but it does take time. I ask people-- how long did it take you to get to AlAnon? Most of us, it took years. Why would you think you can get all the answers in a few weeks?? Give it time, Sherry, and you can live a joyous, spiritual life whether your son is using or not.
Of course, let's hope it's NOT!
I like this post Sherry, it made me feel very safe and warm? Not sure why, will have to reflect on that, but I thank you so much for sharing and I think I will get back to an Al-Anon meeting next week.
I had to smile at what your mother said, I'm glad J got a laugh out of it too. I know this whole jail/rehab thing really through my mom for a loop - its a different world.
I love this quote: "Relationships are a mirror for our internal life" and the way Melody explains it. Its so true, and so good to remember that at all times.
This makes me want to go to a meeting! Little nuggets of information like this can be very inspiring and everyone needs a little inspiration. I try to find a daily dose of inspiration everyday but not always successfully.
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